How to Honor Your Husband: Create a Culture of Honor

by Marilynn Chadwick

I’m convinced the tone I set in our home by honoring David inspired our children to honor him and each other. It feels good to get respect. To be honored. But it also feels incredibly good to honor someone else. We find that as we give honor, we get it back.

But giving honor, especially in a world which has largely forgotten this concept, doesn’t come easily. It takes practice. I’ve learned that home is a wonderful laboratory for cultivating honor. My hope is that the culture of honor we create will spill over into the culture around us.

I believe our world today is thirsty for honor, as evidenced by a conversation I had some years ago. “I don’t enjoy going to lunch with my work friends anymore,” my young friend confided over coffee. “The conversation always turns into husband bashing,” she added. Her own marriage wasn’t perfect, she admitted. “I’m a very transparent person,” she smiled. “So I try to be real. But I don’t want to dishonor my husband. And I want my friends to know I truly love being married to him.”

As we talked, she came to the conclusion that it was okay for her to be honest with her friends about some of her own marriage struggles. She could share a few of the positive ways she and her husband have discovered to work through their issues. But she resolved to do this in a manner that would honor both Christ and her husband.

I loved my friend’s heart for her husband and for the Lord. I felt sure she would be a winsome witness to her friends about what it means to have a godly marriage. And more importantly, what it means to follow Christ.

That conversation was just one of many I had with women of all ages while writing Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband. Even today, I still yearn to help wives reclaim the lost art of honoring their husbands.

Perhaps it’s time to take a fresh look at this age-old virtue. We can start by honoring God. “Those who honor me, I will honor” (1 Samuel 2:30). Then, let’s explore practical ways to honor our husbands. Remember, the world is watching us. And deep down, I believe they’re thirsty for honor—especially honor in marriage.

This series is adapted from Marilynn Chadwick’s book, Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband. To download your free PDF copy of the book, please visit our website by clicking here!

How to Honor Your Husband: The Training Wheels of Honor

by Marilynn Chadwick

Honor is not a subject you hear much about these days. If anything, we've become much more accustomed to disrespect and dishonor. The urban slang for disrespect, or “dis,” made its way into everyday language. Most any child can tell you what it means to “dis” someone. Or worse, to be “dissed.”

Honor. Simply put, the word means to treat someone with respect or admiration. It has to do with qualities like honesty, integrity and dignity. The biblical version of honor is much weightier. Even lofty. It speaks to the precious worth of the person being honored and is related to words like glory, worship or prize.

Most of us yearn to be treated with respect. We benefit not only from receiving honor but also from giving it to others.

God set the bar low so that even a child can show honor. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth” (Ephesians 6:2,3 NIV) (Exodus 20:12). You might call this the “the training wheels of honor.”

When children honor their earthly parents, they begin to grasp what it means to honor their heavenly Father.

Perhaps it’s time to recapture this age-old virtue. We can start by honoring God. But let's do so with a sense of expectancy. For God himself makes this bold promise: “Those who honor me, I will honor” (1 Samuel 2:30).

This series is adapted from Marilynn Chadwick’s book, Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband. To download your free PDF copy of the book, please visit our website by clicking here!

How to Honor Your Husband: If You Want to Be Strong, Abide

by Marilynn Chadwick

A young mom once asked me if there was anything I’d do differently if I were just starting out in my marriage. After giving it some thought, I responded that I’d be even more intentional about abiding in Christ. I’ve come to believe that abiding—developing an ongoing connection with the Lord—is the secret to lasting strength in marriage.

A while back, my husband David made a comment that got me thinking. “I really like it that you’re not needy,” he said. “I can tell you’re not looking to me for your identity.” He went on to say, “Because of your relationship with the Lord, you come to our marriage with a full cup. I know you’re not going to drain me dry.” I’m intrigued that his comment sticks out in my mind all these years later.

I’ve thought further about what he said. David knows my weaknesses better than anyone. He has walked me through more fears and more tears than I can count. And yet, he still considers me strong. Perhaps he sees strength in me that I don’t even see in myself. The strength that comes from my relationship with Jesus.

Abiding in Christ is not some magic pill you swallow and then, “Bam, you’re in!” No, it’s a daily process carved out with one foot in front of the other. Even on days I don’t feel like it. Especially on days when I don’t feel like it.

Let’s remember. Everything God created was good. But he looked at Adam and said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” Something was missing. So God said: "I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18 NIV).

I’ve come to believe that in a very real way, the call to be a strong helper, or ezer, in my marriage is a call to a daily walk with Christ. It’s saying yes when Jesus calls to me to follow him. Yes to honoring my husband. And yes to abiding.

This series is adapted from Marilynn Chadwick’s book, Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband. To download your free PDF copy of the book, please visit our website by clicking here!