Overcoming People-Pleasing: Don't Worry About What Other People Think About You

by David Chadwick

The first step to overcoming people-pleasing is to realize that people make lousy gods.

Here’s the second tip. Don't worry about what other people think about you. It’s a trap.

My dad used to say this phrase to me all the time. Then he would add, “The truth is, they aren’t thinking about you at all. They are too busy thinking about themselves.”

People-pleasing is an endless cycle that leads to nowhere. Trust me. I have had to learn this lesson the hard way. The more I try to keep everyone around me happy, the more unhappy I become.

We were never designed to spend our energy making sure that everyone is okay. That is a burden that only God is designed to carry. He is God. We are not. And most of our problems come when we mix up those two concepts.

Dear friend, when you worry what people think about you, your priority becomes having their approval instead of God’s approval. And it’s a never-ending cycle.

Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked...” Even our most benevolent thoughts and actions can have a hint of selfishness in them. We are all prone to choosing the options that in some way will exalt us. Decisions made from selfish ambition don’t honor God. They seek to please people.

My Dad’s advice helps rid us of the idolatry of people-pleasing and keeps us from worrying about what people are thinking about us.

So stop worrying. Those around you are not thinking about you at all. They are too busy thinking about themselves.

Realize this and you will be free to be a true worshiper of the one true God.