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  • Writer's pictureDavid and Marilynn Chadwick

Love Is Not Resentful

What is love? 

The definition of love is found only once in the Bible: “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). 

Let’s continue to give ourselves a biblical “love” test by looking closely at the words and phrases used to describe love.

The ninth biblical descriptor of love is “not resentful.”

This kind of love doesn’t hold grudges.  It erases memories of past wrongs, choosing instead to leave the past in the past.  

Agape love forgives as we have been forgiven (Ephesians 4:32).  It foregoes retaliation and revenge, desiring only to follow Jesus’s example, which exudes the essence of true forgiveness.

Love that is resentful strives to make others constantly pay for their mistakes.  Its intent is to hurt others as it has been hurt.  It wants the other to suffer as you have suffered.  To perpetuate this pain causes a bitter root that defiles many - especially those closest to you (Hebrews 12:15). 

Love that is not resentful looks to the future with hope.  It doesn’t drive life’s car looking in the rearview mirror.  It understands that looking back fuels the fires of bitterness raging within. 

How are you doing with the ninth part of God’s love test?  

Before you answer, consider this: Are you joyful in the midst of hardship, giving thanks for lessons learned?  Or do you blame others for your woes, hoping they will be hurt as you have? 

I think now you are ready to answer.

“Love is not resentful…”

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