The Madness of Unforgiveness: Forgive Yourself

by David Chadwick

Sometimes the hindrance to forgiveness can loom over your head because of the offender. Other times, you may experience a hindrance because you haven’t learned to forgive yourself.

1 Corinthians 13 says that love does not keep a record of past wrongs. This can certainly refer to those who have hurt you. But it also refers to ourselves when we have done something wrong. We must not keep a list of all the things we have done wrong and ruminate over them in our mind.

In fact, 2 Corinthians 10:5 says to “take every thought captive to obey Christ.” Nothing should take up space in our minds rent free that hasn’t first been submitted to Jesus and filtered through his Word.

In the same way that we are called to forgive others (Luke 6:37), we must forgive ourselves.

This might even be a daily discipline that you have to go through, at least for a season. You might have to wake up, look yourself in the mirror and say something like, “David (you fill in your name), you are covered by the blood of Jesus and forever forgiven. There is absolutely nothing you can do to separate yourself from God’s love. You are not the sum total of your life’s mistakes. Jesus can redeem any situation and make it good. Pick yourself up and walk in your true identity as a son of the Most High God.”

What you say may look a little different, but that should give you an idea of what it looks like to learn forgiveness for yourself!

Satan keeps wanting to remind us of the sins we have committed. Wanting us to believe that our sins are somehow stronger than God’s grace. It’s a lie! Remember what it says in Romans 5:20-21, “Where sin increased, grace abounded all the more!”

I often wonder if this is why Jesus appeared to his disciples behind closed doors after the resurrection. To be with them intimately, in a close setting so that he could remind them to forgive themselves. For betraying him. For running away. For their lack of courage. For only then could they truly obey John 20:21, “As the Father has sent me, even so I am sending you.”

I believe the disciples had to be unencumbered from all guilt and shame, truly forgiving themselves, in order to be fully used by him in the world in the years to come. And I believe the same holds true for us!